NASCAR SPEED STREET 09-RANCH DISCOVERY

Here it goes. I warn you now, as scary as this may seem the truth only gets worse. This thing called Speed Street or Speed Week or whatever comes in every year headed up by the Bujahideen Commanders from far, far away. As it goes this may be one of Charlotte's biggest Bujahideen maneuvers of the year and it comes in with its head held low right onto the streets that I work on all year round. Amazing that I do not go looking for this, in all actuality it comes looking for me so I feel obligated to share this following photo essay with you. That way you too can share in all that this American Freedom offers you. Please fasten your seat belt, pour yourself a luke warm bowl of Ranch Dressing that has been sitting in the sun for a week and enjoy what I have gotten out of bed at 0500hrs to present to you:

Yes, this is the Ranch Table where they were giving it away. Can you imagine the Cracked Out look on my face while I was making this Image?
As much as you could ever want.

Take 2, put it in you, then throw it away.

Take 4, then come back for more.

This is the lonely little Ranch that I found early on which motivated me to find the source, the source of the Ranch.

Notice the Hellman's Mayonnaise Bag. That means you could prolly get Ranch and Mayo, mix them together and have a delicious white treat.

The Bank in full Bujahideen Fashion made sure the public knew what was not going on within the great walls. It was okay however to be in Billy's work space with it all.

Cardboard Ladies.

I saw this quite often.

Being given away.

Hands out to take it, not even sure what it is.

All day long.

For 4 days.

Why the stink eye lady? Your feet hurt?

The CFD is installing the intelligence meters that will calculate the collective thought taking place during this year's event.

Yup, this is an interesting shot.

So much so this camera operator was all over it.

More to put in you then throw away.

GM vs. Dale Earnhardt, are you kidding?

Hamburger Helper.

Scary music playing in your head.

Take one, they are free, then you can put free stuff in it, then after that you can throw it away.

Yes, the Bug has a hawk because it heard about mine.

Charlotte's first shirt/bag less messenger just trying to do his job.

Bike Commuter getting it done.

Speed Street. Where you can get wasted by noon, pass out then poop yourself like it is cool.

More give away.

Dude-The WienerMobile!

Check out this Bujahideen spy that was sent out to see what I was up to.

He thought he was stealthy in the white stripes but I had him pegged the minute I saw this Bujahideen Spy for sure. Don't worry Mr. Spy, I was merely documenting the truth.

and more....

tons of it

non nutritional food items

That is a lot of free powder to put up into your brain housing group.

This as an interesting perspective.

This guy says, "Where's that little wise ass the Ghost of Jerry Reed? I wanna punch him in the nuts, his blog is funnier than a cow with 7 legs and 2 spines!"

The WBTV News Team Signing Autographs. Meteorologist Kelly Franson is at the top of the picture and due to full Sychro about 43mins after this image was made Ms. Arcen(not at Speed Street at all) and I rode with her on an elevator 3 blocks away. Kelly was really down to earth and seemed honestly nice. When the 3 of us stepped off the box on the roof Ms. Franson was so empowered by our conversation that she tried to walk through a glass wall next to the door. She came to an abrupt stop with a thud and Ms. Arcen held back her laughter until she knew that the Meteorologist was okay. Hilarious.

I pledge allegiance to the Toon.

I swear to support

the Global Corperate Plan of Aggression

by my innate desire to join the Bujahideen.

I promise

to put it in me

even though I will get nothing out of it.

So help me God.

Throw away containers for all the throw away.

It was brought to my attention that Fatty's blog logo looks like a Combos advert. Sort of.

Fun for everyone.

Dale Jr. has so much money he bought himself a Mini-Him.

There's that Combo logo again.

Frankie says, "It ain't no joke and I ain't joking!" Dude, tell me you are not now cracked.

Hell Yeah, 2 dollar water!

One of the Creepiest things I saw. Mustache, cute puppet, no official connection to anything and making contact with random childrens.

Hello to you as well Mr. Pepper.

Look out lady, there is a Pepper coming up behind you, run!

This was one of the hardest images I had to make during my solo cracked out 2 hour adventure on the streets that I call my work place. I looked at this woman's face through the glass but only hit the shutter when I dropped it below her neck. I hope for sure that her baby will be okay. If it is lucky maybe it will just be born with stangely developed thumb nails. It could perhaps wind up being way worse for it will be born to a Mama that is actively choosing Grit and Mountain Dew over the life form in her body.